EA Rant: What the heck happened?

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MrPaintRavioli's avatar
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So...EA.

(covers for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 and 2, Mass Effect 3, Shaq Fu, and Star Wars Battlefront 2015)

Yes, that EA. Electronic Arts. Dubbed the worst company in America.

Now, my experience with EA is pretty limited. The most I've played from them is the Harry Potter games. Specifically, Sorcerer's Stone on Game Boy Color, Chamber of Secrets on GBC and GameCube, Prisoner of Azkaban on GameCube, and Goblet of Fire for GameCube. Here are my thoughts in a nutshell: Stone and Chamber on GBC are good Final Fantasy clones, Chamber on GCN and Prisoner are good games with a 3-D RPG feel a la Zelda, and Goblet of Fire SUCKS!

Yes, Goblet of Fire was complete slag. In fact, I plan on reviewing the games, and this is my reaction when I have to play GOF: [link]

Replace Dr. Loomis with me, Jamie Lloyd with the Puppet Master, and the scissors with my GCN copy.

So EA has been the center of much controversy because of releasing cruddy games, and talking smack about the Wii U.

Now, before we continue, I should make one thing perfectly clear. I am mostly a Nintendo gamer. I don't have much experience with non-Nintendo console gaming, so I can name quite a few examples:

-playing on one of my relatives' PlayStation 3. Game: Marvel's Ultimate Alliance (or at least I think it was called that). Level: noob.
-playing on my cousin's PlayStation 4. Game: Call of Duty: Ghosts. Level: noob. I hated it. I was really bad at it, and I can guess I'm not good at first-person shooters. But then again, I could get the entire Metroid Prime trilogy on Wii U Virtual Console and be good at it! Playing COD felt like shame, regret, and lack of strategic thinking.
-playing on my cousin's PlayStation 4. Game: Minecraft: PS3/4 Edition. Level: apprentice. It was pretty hard, but I might have gotten the hang of it despite button confusion (my biggest weakness in non-Nintendo consoles). Nintendo consoles: West: Y. North: X. East: A. South: B. Microsoft: West: X. North: Y. East: B. South: A. (Think Sega Dreamcast)
-playing on my orthodontist's waiting room's Xbox 360. Game: LEGO Pirates of the Caribbean. Level: noob.

So, there you go. I have very few experience with any non-Nintendo consoles, and even I wish I could get my hands on a Sega Genesis. And an SNES. I've PLAYED SNES games, but they were GBA/DS ports!

The point is EA has decided it was a jolly good idea to say the Wii U is garbage. Here's an actual quote on the Internet I found!

(Fur Elise starts playing as I read it in a whiny voice)

"The WiiU is crap. Less powerful that the XBOX 360. Poor online/store. Nintendo are walking dead at this point"

Sometimes, I wish I could have a polite conversation with this guy about the pros of the Wii U, or wish I could Silver Shamrock his--

(clip from "Avengers: Age of Ultron")

Captain America: LANGUAGE!

Anyway, I know EA has been anti-Wii U for quite a while. Honestly, the Wii U should have more third-party games. In fact, not just EA.

So let's switch to the next part: their games.

From what I've heard, Mass Effect 3 was rather...mixed. The new Battlefront I heard sucked, and EA Sports have done nothing but Madden. Not to mention they made Shaq Fu.

The Harry Potter games are also a bit weird. Again, like I said, games 1 to 3 are good, 4 sucks, and the LEGO titles are pretty good.

Now, 1,2, and 3 have problems. But that doesn't mean I hate everything in them (picture of Angry Joe) like some people!

(clip from Angry Joe Show: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows)

Angry Joe: ALL 9 OF THESE GAMES! PLUS THE SH**** SPIN-OFF GAME!

(Evil Andres/Ravioli appears)

Now HE deserves to be Silver Shamrock'd!!!

(back to normal)

I have no idea why I just started acting like the guy from Boots to Reboots.

I have this odd idea for a Wii U Harry Potter video game would have to be done right in order to win back the gamers who lost faith in EA, but we'll get to that when we get to that.

Overall, EA seems to be going downhill, but they CAN stop this. But that doesn't mean they WILL.

Signed,

That hobo MrPaintRavioli
© 2016 - 2024 MrPaintRavioli
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AspiringCreator's avatar
I think a common problem I'm noticing with all these reviews is honestly, they do really work... in the visual medium. With text, yes indeed people are aware of the images and could probably picture this in their head but overall I just find it very hard to get into the humor portion with how this style is (that and I do believe with the exclamations that people like Angry Joe should get Silver Shamrock'd all because their opinions differed is a bit silly. I get it of course that this character for these reviews is meant to be more than a little crazy but I don't know, the craziness just feels forced.).

As for the topic at hand... well... considering I've played a good chunk of EA games and have read up about their practices, I will say that in my opinion, they're not at all the worst company. To me, that honor is reserved for Konami.